All cat owners are convinced their cat adores them, the loving provider of daily food, affection and a warm home. But what would your cat tell you if he/she could speak? Would they shower you with praise for providing them a loving home?
Not likely if you were to ask Mungo – a neutered tomcat who provides his witty cat’s eye view of life in this new parody book called ‘This Cat Does Not Love You‘
Everyone’s a critic, but cats get personal. This Cat Does Not Love You is a tongue in cheek gift book told through hilarious text that delights in disdain, and brilliantly odd ball illustrations. Discover what your cat is really thinking and what the meaning is behind those looks, twitches and ‘loving’ gestures in this hilarious feline focused monologue.
We contacted the publisher who kindly offered to donate 5 signed copies to us which we raffled off to 5 lucky Purrington Post readers! Contest now closed.
Written by Emma Young and illustrated by Katie Abey, ‘This Cat Does Not Love You’ is a hilarious parody for any cat lover well acquainted with the delightful disdain of our most beloved furry friends.
Think your cat loves you? Think again…
* Contest Entry Guidelines:
This contest ended on June 30th, 2017 and was available to residents of the United States, United Kingdom and Canada. To enter the contest entrants needed to submit a comment in our “Leave a Reply” section at the bottom of this page saying:
My cat’s name is [name of your cat]. If [name of your cat] could speak I bet he/she would tell me [what your cat would say and whether he loves you or not and why]
The winners were chosen by the authors from all the correct entries and contacted by email.
Emma Young loves every cat that she meets, unconditionally and probably unrequitedly. She is the proud owner of a ginger mother-and-daughter team, Maggie and Wick. Emma lives in London. You can follow Emma on Twitter at @truffleoilyum
Katie Abey provides illustrative doses of happiness, motivation, sarcasm and general randomness. Her work usually features puns and crazy animals. She lives in Derbyshire. You can follow Katie on Instagram at @KatieAbey
Can’t wait and want to order one now? Grab a copy from Amazon here => Buy a Copy of This Cat Does Not Love You
My cat’s name is Roscoe. If Roscoe could speak I bet he would tell me how much he likes his life. He is adored, well cared for and catered to, has the best hunting grounds a cat could ever want and he loves his family as much as they love him. Roscoe is a cool dude living the good life and doesn’t have to speak to get what he wants. He does it with a look and gets everything he wants.
Mt cat’s name is Charity. If Charity could speak I bet she would tell me she is the luckiest cat in the world. She has me 100% to herself and gets all the attention she wants. When she wants to be alone she finds a quiet place to sleep. No big dogs to annoy her, no other cat to challenge her space. She loves me and does not want to share me with anyone.
My cat’s name is Sushi. If Sushi could speak she would tell me how much she hates me because I sleep in her bed every night and I do not share my food with her. She believes she owns the house and resents me for using any part of it that does not benefit her. Bathroom- hers, refrigerator and its contents-hers, every bed-hers and my son-hers. Life is very good for her as long as I treat her like the queen she is.
My cat’s name is Friend. If Friend could speak I bet he would tell me that even though he likes to sleep between my legs at night or when I nap, he could really do without me farting in my sleep. Even though he thinks I occasionally stink, he still appreciates all the goodies I give him. And although he often sleeps with his fluffy belly exposed, it is a trap, not an invitation. But the mice, rats, birds, and gophers are for me after he kills and plays with them, since they have passed their usefulness. Eat up!!
My cats’s names are Isis & Sanura. If they could talk they would say that they love me because I’m a complete pushover who will stop whatever I’m doing to obey their demands for attention, food, opening of door etc. Also because I’m always telling them how gorgeous & adorable they are-stating the obvious but still….
My cat’s name is Indie. If Indie could speak I bet he would tell us even though he wakes us up with purrs in the morning, he really is just saying, “get up you crazy humans and feed me!” Indie would say, “humans are more or less items or machines. I must entertain them and keep ’em well oiled to maintain my food and beverage supply and clean litter box. I tell them I I love them as long as they give me what I want. Otherwise, I will make their lives miserable and may even poop on their bed!”
My cat’s name is Jaguar. If Jaguar could speak I bet he would tell me he is most displeased with my hiding of all the precious plastic bags in the house, (he is a foster fail) and in his country plastic was a delicacy. It is the simplest thing and all he wants, to ingest everything wonderfully plastic and hates me for foiling his attempts. He secretly plots my death daily, and steals things out of spite (and lack of plastic) but then I provide food again and he decides to let me live for one more day!
Hi my cats name are Nini and Juju. If Nini could talk will say : Mommy don’t travel much and leave m with juju. I want to b beside u , I love when I call u to play hide and seek and u do . U listen to all my different miaws and you respond and you know what I want.i don’t like when you bring other kitties to save them from the street and that’s the reason I pee on your bed. I m jealous. I want to have all your attention and my favorite moment is when we sleep and you hug m. I love ❤️ you my Human mommy❤️🐾😻🐾😻❤️
My cat’s name is Pica. If Pica could speak I bet she would tell me “your children annoy the sh*t out of me and I want to run away but your lap is warmer than the outdoors; so instead, I’ll just say good luck finding your elastics”.
My cat’s name is Cujo. If Cujo could speak I bet he would tell me that he forgives me for bringing that other cat into his house even though he has to share the attention now. Every day he shows he loves me by sticking his paw in my face to wake me up, or that could simply be that he wants fed NOW. From the day I rescued him til today, he has always been quite the gentleman, quick with the purr or simply just being there, if that what he feels I need.
Every cat is different , I have one that is affectionate on his own time and place. Sunshine will be asking for some lovin’ today, and I may not even see him tomorrow.
Our cat’s name is Kitty. If Kitty could speak I bet she would tell me that anything to the right side of her face is in a Danger Zone and might be subject to Immediate Conquest.
My cats name is momo. If momo could speak I think she would say mom, thank you for the food, water. And litter and toys but I believe we could do without the other cat here. She is just taking up space and I can’t be queen if she is here. She keeps trying to take over on me. Can she not be my sister please. U don’t think I need one. Oh and I think wet food is yummier than the dry stuff mom. And believe me I will catch and kill the red dot one day
My Gidget would love this book, well both of us would love it. Cat ladies for life! 😊😉😍
My cat’s name is Ava Marie. If Ava Marie could speak I bet she would tell me, thank you for welcoming me to your family & I love you, because you saved my life.
I have 3 cats named Peanut, Sylvia and Thistle. All of my kitties are rescues. My Thistle would tell everyone that Momma rescues all of the kitties who are ill, “broken”, needy, dying, “not wanted” out of shelters. We have had 7 at one time and Momma makes sure that we all have our own space and time. I love to play with the middle kitties because they play back. The older ones just wash me and want me to sleep. I wanna play!! Momma also puts our faces in very weird pictures (hearts, sparkles, etc)….She is a little loco, but I love her. She also gives headbutts and purrs back to me….
My cat’s name is Simba. If Simba could speak, he would tell me that he would love you even more, if you left food in my bowl all the time and never let it go empty. I am not overweight, I am just pleasingly plump and more to cuddle with.
My cat’s name is Moonshine . If Moonshine could speak I bet he would tell me that he needs more Tuna the expensive kind, in the pouch that cost $3 a pack , remember our relationship is mutual you consider me the most beautiful cat in the world a male cat model . I let you look at me and pet me on occasion and you provide me with a lot and I mean a lot of Tuna. Otherwise I go out the same door you find me at and talk to the neighbors in the bigger and better house down the street, they will understand my needs.